Tuesday, 12 January 2016

Chocolate Cake is not Evil

So it's Daves birthday and he's arrived with a mahoosive chocolate cake.  I tried to say no, but hell its only calories, I needed it and it needed me.

I don't feel bad about it, I've eaten regular healthy meals for 12 days now and I feel amazingly smug, I've lost 6lb since the start of the year, most of that is the Xmas binge.

Being an overeater is the worst things in the world, at least with drugs/alcohol/cigarettes you can just go cold turkey, but you need food to survive !! I'm not good at making the right choices, I'm finding it hard when I'm out and about, not in control, I'm useless when faced with a menu.

I've decided that I will have one cheat meal every fortnight, if I want to, and I won't feel bad, sad or mad at myself.

It's a long hard road.

On the plus side I have cleaned, read two books already and four episodes of Seinfeld 

Friday, 1 January 2016

This is Not Another Resolution Post

I'm not making any resolutions this year, instead I am making a list of things I would like to do/happen in 2016.  And to start blogging again...

Early last year I went onto a Change Your Life course thru the NHS, I had a severe issue with my leg (which wasn't weight related) but felt as I was the heaviest i'd ever been that I needed to DO something, this epiphany changed my life, since then I have met some amazing women and lost 4 stone, then i went on holiday and myfitnesspal lost my streak as i had no wifi on the last night ! I lost my momentum and things went out of the window, what went into my mouth means that i put back on 9.5lbs !!!! to be fair most of that was prior to xmas, and i knew that i was setting myself up for a huge gain.

Don't get me wrong, I have enjoyed everything that went into my mouth, the red velvet chocolate teacakes, the after eight mints, crisps, toblerone, my bodyweight in the most divine marks and spencers pate and the marshmallow fluff oreo Tesco cheesecake, and i feel no shame, i enjoy food...


I am an over-eater

Ergo I am also FAT

Fat is not a dirty word, although i am losing weight, i am doing this by being healthy, its a conscious choice for my health not my size, i wasnt happy thin (i was a size 10 when i met my husband) and i am happier now than ive ever been.

If you don't like happy fat chicks then move along now...

This is partly down to the plus size and proud and body positive movement that i found last year on instagram, i have since met some of the lovely ladies, its a shock to my system that you can be fat and love yourself.  I think it also shocks others that there can be people who exist that are fat and happy.  

So this is the 365 days of a new year, its a blank page, i'm back on track, i'm going to log my food and watch my calories and feel better about myself and not care what people think, and if that means i lose weight along the way then thats ok too.

The number on the scales isn't important to me anymore, although my shiny aria fitbit scales are quite amazing, its my way of staying focused.  I weigh myself every day, and yes i know this is scandalous and not the best way but it helps me.  I have a group of people who support me, and i love myself more than i have ever done.  I am not defined by my dress size.  I no longer care if i have to size up or down depending on where i shop, if it fits i buy it, i am so much more comfortable in my own skin.

Its been a revelation 

So heres my 16 things to achieve in 2016

1. Read more
2. Bake more
3. Walk more - 5,000 steps target
4. Try to stitch more, hard with a puppy involved
5. Visit my family more
6. Watch Seinfeld from the beginning
7. Lose 5 stone, but not really care along the way
8. Don't buy crap i dont need
9. Stop coveting 'things'
10. Don't start collecting new 'stuff'
11. Get a new tattoo
12. Love More
13. Worry Less
14. Declutter my life
15. Do more Random Acts of Kindness
16. Do more cleaning (yah right, this is the one that will be the hardest pmsl)

love and peace

Katya Coldheart